you're the muse in my life, when you leave i'll die.

PACKPACKPACKPACKPACKPACKPACKPACK.
But eh.
I'm laaaaaazy.

:P

couldn't have planned it much better I swear

Never felt this way,
like I'm okay just the way I am.
It's a little too perfect.
But I'm still uncertain.
Here I go again.
If you take my heart,
you might break my heart,
but this time it might be worth it.

swing, swing, swing the spinning step

Come on stars, come on crossed fingers.
Come on every four leaf-clover there ever was.
Come smile on me.

Please?

RUTHAAAAAY

doesn't even have a modem right now.
has glasses super-glued in two places.
should be finishing her poem RIGHT NOW. ;p
bought me dinner last night. :D
is sleeping over soon.
makes fail cookies with me.
has dimples. :(
knows where to draw the line about which poptarts are worth it.
can act.
can sing.
can LEAP. Like awesomely.
wore high heels for like five hours straight last night.
is understanding.
makes me be good.
isn't coming to Prom! :'(
has talked on the phone with me for hours.
is moving to California. :'(
is AWESOME.
sometimes forgets that.
should try to remember it. Or else. :P
got Mrs. Wheat really mad at me. ;P
is good at helping guys change clothes. Lol! :D
can think up the most awesomest "telephone" phrases.
stops Roland when he gets talking on a random tangent that isn't going anywhere. :P
is usually right.
has a smile that could light up a room.
is my fall-back place.
writes.
is a ninja.
is going to be missed horribly.

there must be some kinda twist.

The other day at Pizza Hut, there was a guy with a t-shirt that said,
"I can't...I'm Morman."
For some reason, it really got to me.
Why? Because a more accurate shirt would say,
"I won't...I'm Mormon." Or "I don't...I'm Mormon."
Because Mormonism is all about free agency. All about choosing. All about looking at the big picture and deciding what to say yes to and what to say no to and having faith in those choices. I can do whatever I want. If not now, when I'm 18 I'll be able to do whatever I want. But there are a lot of things I WON'T do, and that's just because I'm SMART. :D

The End.

Someday,

it'll be just you and me,
and I'll create a world
with dancing bears and strawberries.
Where it rains every Thursday,
and minutes last for hours.
Where the night never ends,
and all the right words come out of my mouth.
And the air will smell like you,
the oceans taste like you.
Where you make me laugh and laugh and laugh,
til I can't stand it.
Where I am not the problem,
and every song sings your name.
Where the top of the world is ours
and that's all we need.

'cuz i wrote your name across my hand.

I feel like I could never be lonely,
except for when you’re not around.

Words don’t come,
My head’s swimming.
But I’ll keep swimming through this nonsense
Because it tastes so good.
Don’t know if I should.

Open me up. Hold me down. <3
I’ll stay with you.
I might’ve just stolen this scene from a song.
The world’s on fire. Hurry up and wait.
This is happening.
So empty your thoughts and open your heart to the bliss.
The rescue team can’t save me now I’m out too far.
I was caught in an awkward silence, broken down by the sound of your prelude that you played, to open our symphony.
You and I are one of a kind.
We are more than this world’s got to offer.
Walks a thin line between what is and what could be.
Getting closer to something I can’t understand
Dancing on the grave of something I thought was still alive.
Don’t give up on our almost love.
A beautiful unfolding of a love that will be.
Candy coated prison bars.
It keeps leaving me needing you.
It’s hard to believe I’m yours.
Worth it.
You’re my dream please come true.
Over thinking.
I wrote this letter in my head ‘cuz so many things were left unsaid.
Light up, light up, as if you have a choice.
So perfect is real.
I wonder if maybe, maybe, I could be all you ever dreamed, cuz you are.
Intense.

Sha la la la.

take a picture

Glittering lights,
led me nowhere.
But dimly lit trails,
bring me here.

Time how long it takes,
for a rose to bloom.
Nothing climbs faster
than time already wasted.

Evil is real.
but oh so destructible.
Sweet victory.

Fate knows what she's doing.

from when I wake in the morning and fall asleep each night

Today.
We don't have water.
I'm tired.
My knee hurts.
I didn't go to NMC.
BUT...
I learned something.

I learned that:
I am selfish. :(
I'm less stressed after I eat.
There's more life left to go.
I need to get a job.
My pride will be my downfall.
This earth is unappreciated.
There's half a chance in this moment.
Peanut butter is messy.
I'm out too far.
Forever sometimes ends. (And sometimes that's good.)

87.5%

Because I am barely breathing, my brain is beginning to bleed bad. But before I believe that my bunk bed will buckle under bundles of burning beats, I'll beg my brother to blame the blue barnacle that bet on beaver's bomb. Because B's freaking break the bounty of better girls well-being. Bi Bate Bou.

:'(

But you know what?

It's gonna be okay.

the outcome's still the same.

Math
Grades
Cold
Hot
Music
Love
Scared
Shadowed
Small
Write
Wrong
Time
Control
Loss
Hope
Heal
Release
Maybe

Free Fallin'

Mm. <3

but it wasn't like a magazine

You said,
"It's no curse."
You said,
"It'll be over soon."
You said,
"Hold out until then."
You say,
"This will end."
You lie.
You lied, lied, lied, lied.
It's still there.
It will still be there.
You'd miss it too much, wouldn't you?
You'd miss that power. It's all in your hands now, why loose it if you don't have to? Hold on to it. That sweet control. You know you want to.
It's what I'm used to.
It's what I'm used to.
Can't hurt me any more than it already has. So don't let that grate your conscience.

Funny to think about.
That I really can't escape you.
Green is blue.
Blue is green.
If you say so.
Because you said so.

6 times a year.
No. Just take it all away. Then you don't even have to deal with it.
Just say NO to everything. Then you don't have to make up reasons.
While you're at it, get rid of everything I'm looking forward to.
I might even learn a lesson from it.

Ah.

It's hard to be in love with
a perfectionist,
cuz you know with me,
things are never quite perfect.
Though I adore
every imperfection,
that he adorns
quite perfectly.

ssaaffeettyyssuuuiiittt. <3

Is this the end of the moment or just a beautiful unfolding of a love that will never be or maybe be.
And I wonder if maybe, maybe, I could be all you ever dreamed, cause you are.
I'd rather be anywhere but here without you.

I wanna be with you
I wanna see what you see, see what you see in me

If I could be with someone like you
Would you, would you be strong enough for me
Can you see me holding you right in my arms, right in my arms

Hold on.
You can stay one more hour, can you stay one more hour
You know I'm gonna find a way to let you have your way with me
You know I'm gonna find a time to catch your hand and make you stay
Hold on, Cause what's the point in chasing if I can't enjoy your face and
We can't be wrong tonight, can we be wrong tonight?

And if I was running, you'd be the one who I would be running to
And if I was crying, you would be lining the cloud that would pull me through
And if I was scared, then I would be glad to tell you and walk away
But I am not lying, I am just trying to find my way in to you

Hoping for a moment that I turn around and you'll be coming after me
Cause all that I can say is that it's obvious, it's obvious you're all I see
But I can't read you.

You tell me once, you tell me twice, you tell me three times more
Tell me everything I want to hear and nothing more
Cause you know I am on your side no matter what you do
With every consequence it's your defense on why it's mine.

From when I wake in the morning till I go and I fall asleep each night
I fight to hold onto a love that is inside.

There was a girl named Annie, she had a very pretty face
And not the way you think so let me see if I can try to explain it
She had a smile that could light up the room and if she moved it'd be moving in you
But she wasn't like a magazine, she was just plain Jane and her name was Annie

She never looked in the mirror, she never liked what she would see
And even if I tried to tell her, she never listened to a word I'd say
She always wanted what she never had, but never had what she needed so badly
Someone telling her she was fine and that's not right and it's why I'm saying

Annie don't be shy here, Annie don't just lie there, looks don't make the world go round but it comes around
Annie don't be shy here, Annie please don't cry here, I always have to stop myself
Cause you're beautiful

I didn't know if I could tell her, I didn't know if I could make her see
She didn't need to find her beauty, she didn't need to find a way to show me
They took her moments of feeling alive and made them moments of dying inside
She needed someone to scream her name, to take her pain and it's why I'm screaming

Cause you're beautiful.

And Annie you are the one sight my eyes never tire of, it's like I cannot get enough of you, and Annie you are the one song left in my symphony, like you were made for me.


What if it makes you laugh now but you cry as you fall asleep
And what if it takes your breath and you can't hardly breathe
And what if it makes the last sound be the very best sound
Cause you know that I'm always all for you

I think about love, and oh what a beautiful song
And oh how it need to be sung here sing it so loud all the world can hear

Sometimes the edge serves as more than a friend then you thought it would be
And the pages you write in your journal each night are your only release
And the mask you put on it's like words in a song but there's no more to be seen
And the failure you see, don't seem failures to me here at all

But there's no pain you feel that I know love can't heal here at all
Oh I just hope I can find you
And tell you that I know you'll smile again.

the one sight my eyes never tire of.

Save the day
Take this all away
Come on now
Say something to slow these hands down
Just cut off her arms
And infect the words
Can you hear me now?
Can't you hear me?
Save the day
Take this all away
Come on now
My hearts on the floor.

What am I waiting for?
I know what I'm waiting for.
Indecisive thoughts running this game,
Wash them away.
Slowly calling out your name,
Come save the day.
If we find what we're missing,
This space that needs filling is still embracing my neck
We'll hold up each other,
but look for another
To see if our words will connect.

I'll save the day.
Yeah, I'll be the one to save the day.
I'll save the day.

i wander through fiction to look for the truth burried beneath all the lies

Eh.
Sorry for being lame.
Thanks for being amazing.
Sorry for hiding.
Thanks for finding.
Sorry for forgetting.
Thanks for thinking.
Sorry for alkwsdfa;dkxfjs
Thanks for understanding.
Sorry...
Thanks.