but it wasn't like a magazine

You said,
"It's no curse."
You said,
"It'll be over soon."
You said,
"Hold out until then."
You say,
"This will end."
You lie.
You lied, lied, lied, lied.
It's still there.
It will still be there.
You'd miss it too much, wouldn't you?
You'd miss that power. It's all in your hands now, why loose it if you don't have to? Hold on to it. That sweet control. You know you want to.
It's what I'm used to.
It's what I'm used to.
Can't hurt me any more than it already has. So don't let that grate your conscience.

Funny to think about.
That I really can't escape you.
Green is blue.
Blue is green.
If you say so.
Because you said so.

6 times a year.
No. Just take it all away. Then you don't even have to deal with it.
Just say NO to everything. Then you don't have to make up reasons.
While you're at it, get rid of everything I'm looking forward to.
I might even learn a lesson from it.